A tee that behaves like an heirloom — only friendlier.

Somewhere between a wholesome greeting card and a middle finger sits this face, and it knows exactly which one it's leaning toward. The smile is a clean arc, the eyes are two long ovals, standard smiley furniture. Then you clock the eyebrows: rock-horns hands, thrown up like the whole thing just walked offstage.

That's the joke doing the actual work here. "Have the day you deserve" reads sincere until you notice who's saying it, and then it reads like a dare. Wear this and you're not wishing anyone well, exactly, you're wishing them exactly what's coming to them, delivered with a grin and two raised fists. People who get it will grin back. People who don't will just see a smiley, which is its own kind of cover.

The red is the loud, flat kind, not gilt or metallic, more traffic-light bright, which is why it sits so cleanly against black denim, white linen or a navy sweater without competing for attention. It's printed with water-based ink cured low, so the line stays crisp instead of cracking at the curve where the smile bends hardest, and it's on cotton heavy enough that the graphic doesn't wobble when you move.

If sincere pleasantries aren't your thing, this is the version of nice you can actually stand behind. Give it a few wears and it becomes the shirt you reach for on the day you're not in the mood to pretend you are, which turns out to be most of them.

• Fabric
  100% ring-spun combed cotton, single jersey knit
• Weight
  210 GSM — mid-weight with structured drape
• Fit
  Classic regular fit; runs true to size with a generous shoulder
• Print
  Water-based direct-to-garment, cured at low temperature
• Neckline
  Ribbed crew, reinforced with double-needle stitching
• Origin
  Fabric sourced in North Carolina; printed in the USA
• Certification
  OEKO-TEX Standard 100 inks and dyes